Full circle

JOURNAL ENTRY at 10-05-2016:

"full circle

it's when you have a crush on someone and are dating them 2 years later,

it's when you relate to a song because you're heavily depressed and a year later you cry because you can't relate anymore because you're so happy,

it's when you sit on the roof of your house and decide that you really don't want to do this anymore, life, you don't, and a year later your promise your boyfriend to show him that same roof sometime,

it's when you have no idea what to do with your life, so you take a gap year,

and a year later you have met the most amazing people with whom you drank, laughed, cried and are happy with,

it's when everything, kind of, sort of, comes full circle"

***

Isn't it funny that people ask me "what would you want to do over in your life?" I have no answer. Not only because I'm kind of a realist and, well, you can't really go back in time can you? (though I'm not one of those people who can't play along to imaginary scenarios... That's my shit.) But also because I really, really won't. 

Of course, life would've been easier without bullying, depression, anxiety and misfortune but, to be honest and cheesy, it's made me who I am. And without those hardships things would never become full circle. It's so pleasant to look back and to see that things have actually changed! I am a big believer of the butterfly effect ("the scientific theory that a single occurence, no matter how small, can change the course of the universe") if those things, the hard ones, hadn't happened to me would I be the same sarcastic, morbid, strong(ish) Isabel? Probably not. Though this isn't a completely new insight, it is nice to reflect upon. Things coming full circle is almost a prize (or karma, if you believe in that): "well shit's happened, but look how much character development you've been through! Yes! You did it!" 

To end this little pondering on: whatever you're going through, how big or small it may be, things will always come full circle eventually. 

All the love,

Isabel